Saturday, March 27, 2010

The Dusting Off Process

As people our capacity to love is unfathomable. Yet to love ourselves unattainable. I expect perfection; when I fall short I am mean to myself. I sabotage myself in a bizarre self fulfilling prophecy. It is a never ending tiresome circle. I need for it to end. I don't know how to behave in tough emotional situations. I don't trust myself enough to shut off the voices in my head and listen to my instincts. Whenever I am torn about something going on in my life I recall that advertising pitch of an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. Which one will I listen to this time? Lately I let the mini me in red rule the way.


I started this weight loss journey in March of 2007. I have come so far yet I let the finish line loom in front of me. I am convinced I can't finish, that I don't need to. For a long time I haven't wanted to finish. Taking weight off is the easier part of the puzzle. Finding motivation, keeping the motivation is tough but harder still is the balancing act that is needed to maintain the weight you have lost. I have the tools before me to write my own happy beginning. Never give up on the person you are meant to be. Pick yourself up(one more time), dust yourself off(take stock of the damage you have done) and get back to your journey.

Take time to enjoy your life as it unfolds each day.

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The mad chronicling of a Large Marge on a journey to find the girl she used to be.