I don't want to be the headliner in my own sad news story. LargeMarge Gone Bad. Everytime I am on the path to finally being the best version of me I sabotage myself. The whys are the problem. Stress relief, cheap anger management, depression all cheap excuses but hell they'll do in a pinch. I have never tried to right myself once I have begun a slide towards the abyss.
The Good
I started my journey to a healthy weight in March 2007. I lost 145.6 pounds in fourteen months. I adopted a new attitude. I made better food choices. I managed my inner demons.
The Bad
Looking back I was so caught up in the moment I didn't take time to adjust to the new me. I felt insecure in the me I had created. I felt unsure of where to take my journey. I stopped trusting myself. In turn I stopped managing all aspects of getting to goal. I should have sought help instead of trying to figure things out for myself.
The Ugly
When I let things turn ugly they turn UGLY. I have walked away from my journey so often now I am pretty sure I am on a different trip. I have put a chunk of my weight back on. So much so that this ugly needs a new sweater to hide the rolls. I am angry, disappointed, depressed. I am tired of failing. The ugly truth is I have to start over again. I need to forget where I have come from and set my sights on where I want to end up.
The New Beginning
I deserve to become the best example of myself. I want to do this for me. This show is not over. I am worth the trip. I will see this journey through to the end.
No comments:
Post a Comment